Oh. Dear. God. NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WARNING: If you like the Twilight “Books/movies” don’t read this post. Upon reading it you will most likely be filled with, at the very least, and intense dislike for my and, at worst, will want to stab me until I look as dead as Robert Pattinson’s expression.

Now, I’m not going to rant about why this is news or the fact that I find these movies to be not only based on awful source material but just bad films. Nope, that’s been done by the internet as a whole to the point that if the internet gained sentence based on content it would A) Be a mindless sex machine (thanks porn) and B) want to murder the Twilight Saga. So, with that out of the way I’m going to talk about one of the things I find to be just absolutely appalling about this series, which can be summed up in one moment.

After three books/movies of tedious prose and three films that feature little to no actual acting we’re finally treated to some vampire fuckin’. Now I could go on and on about how these books are blatantly espousing a “no sex before marriage, and then only for the baby-making” agenda, but I really want to talk about this moment after one of the most horrifying post-coital statements ever. Now, Bella, having been knocked fucking unconscious by the brutal banging only the pasty ass of Edward could deliver she awakens bruised and borderline broken. The room looks like an aging rock band just got done partying and Edward is apologizing for fucking this girl into unconsciousness (I really can’t stress how distressing that alone is).

Now here’s the kicker and the summation of why I hate this goddanmed series with a passion bordering on insane. She says “It’s not your fault.” You heard that right people. Let’s boil that down: “It’s okay to beat me and sexually harm me because you’re a man and that makes it my fault.”

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?

That’s what this entire string of literary and cinematic feces really gets me about; the blatant misogyny. I’m a man, I can admit that and I have no right to claim what it’s like to be a woman, but by god I sure as shit align with many feminist notions. It constantly puts forth that it’s totally cool to be in an abusive relationship. Hell, you should want that teenage girls so long as the bastard smacking you around is so man-pretty that he sparkles like a stripper.

I had to get that out there. Even if it’s been said before. the fact that this is news is what really bothers me. How did we let this happen?

 

ACTING